It's official, the P90X doubles routine kicked my butt two times in a row. I have been out of commission for about a month due to two shoulder injuries, on top of the flu, on top of some crazy stress from my school this semester. This is a lesson learned: don't overdo it! I definitely piled on too much, and my immune system, nerves, and muscles all got angry at me for doing it.

I don't think I'll be attempting the doubles routine again for a while. Maybe next summer, or after this next round? If anybody out there has actually finished the P90X doubles routine, I would love to hear any tips! As for right now, I am moving on to P90X Plus. I have officially graduated from P90X (doubles is extra credit, not a required course!), so it's on to the next step...and I have to get training for a potential triathlon, or a different long distance cycling project this summer, and time is ticking!

I won't be uploading my progress from this last doubles routine, I was able to increase my total weight and reps, get down to the weight mark I was shooting for, and I have shrunk, yet again, out of my jeans, but I'm not putting up the spread sheets for this one. I'll post progress after this round of Plus, which starts this afternoon. I'm also going to get some photos for before and after this time, promise!

So my system has recovered, I have reset my schedule, and I am restarting the program. I've made a promise not to overdo it, or to get all worked up about the numbers. It's about feeling good, not having a big ego! Anyway, off to the races, people!

EDIT: almost forgot! There's a custom made excel spreadsheet (you are welcome) for tracking P90X Plus progress! Let me know if you love or hate it!

So, one day shy of exactly one year ago, I posted a quick article about making it one whole week without any tobacco intake.

It was not an easy decision to make to quite smoking cigarettes...for good, and here I sit, over one whole year later, an accomplished man. In that post I pointed out how I was coping with the tension and withdraws: by working out. Weights and cardio all the way. That was my approach. It was health that I was after, so putting the focus on actively doing healthy things instead of the negation of unhealthy things just seemed to make sense to me.

I'm pleased to announce the addition of a new section to the site's content: "Joshp's Poetry". The content of this section will NOT, by default, be promoted to the Front Page of Nous Essence, nor will it be, by default, featured on the main feed for the site. But you may see, from time to time, snippets of the work which I decide are nice enough to promote appear in your reader if you are a subscriber to the main site feed. If you are interested in subscribing to the poetry/prose feed directly, just click on this link.

I have been writing poetry, prose, lyrics, short fictions, and literary experiments for the better part of 15 years, and have now decided to filter through the entire existing body of my work, burn the terrible word-vomiting, and publish and/or rework anything that I feel deserves attention. If you subscribe, I look forward to your comments and your support!

So...My first attempt at doing the P90X Doubles routine...failed. This routine adds a CardioX workout to 3 days of the weeks in phase two, and 4 days of the weeks in phase three. This is adding in 2 hours and 15 minutes of workout a week in phase two, and three additional hours a week to phase three. I made it into phase three, second week (week 10 overall) and the holidays hit. Too much running around, really. Too many commitments with time, and a serious loss of will-power. This was the fail. I made the excuse that I have been going strong since April, so why not just take an extra week off? But I still didn't eat like a pig, or gain substantial weight or size, so this is good.

Now, if you look at the spread-sheet attached to this post, then you might see the dates don't add up. If I started in early October, then I should have been almost done by Christmas. Well, here's the other reason I had to press reset: during the middle of the second phase of this round, I had an abscess form under my right arm. Apparently the antiperspirant I was using found a way into my pores, clogged it up, and caused an infection. Sweet. I had a forced open hole in my armpit for a week or two, and then had to let it heal. So, time out for working out. Lesson learned: antiperspirant is product of the devil!

While this is no huge loss, I am a bit bummed out that this has kept me from reaching my weight/size goal for the new year. I wanted to be down to a size 32 waist for certain, and perhaps a size 30 if I could manage it. I am sitting pretty at 34, 215-220 lbs depending on the time of day I weigh myself (I was actually fluxing 10 lbs from morning to afternoon there for a while, is this normal?).

With all of that lost time, I just decided to reset the system and start over. Yes, I am going to do the doubles, again, I'm committed to getting through this. I'm still very, very pleased with the results from my 2 1/2 rounds of p90x so far, and as soon as I get through these doubles I want to try out the P90X Plus! routine, I'm looking forward to that. I also have my eye on a totally other program: Muscle & Fitnes System Home Training program. H'mmm. We'll see, I suppose. I don't think that one is as fine tuned as P90X. In the mean time, I have to get my momentum back, there's a noticeable loss of endurance and energy, so I seriously need to get that back. Yes, i can still get through the workout, but it's just that much more grueling after all of this lost time!

Well, after all of that, and a renewed commitment, looks like all I can do is to do my best, and forget the rest! (Thanks Tony!)

NEAR MISS!

So, here in south-eastern Michigan, on December 27th, just 2 days after Christmas, we have a flood-watch in effect. WTF? It is rainy and all of the snow is melting. All of the ice blocks are diminishing and running off in their little streams towards the rivers and drains. While some may rejoice in this odd, out of season weather by hanging out in their shorts on their new balconies, I think there is some cause for alarm. I mean, it IS Michigan, and it SHOULD be cold and snowy and unpleasant. Every venture out of the house should be a life and death adventure of man vs. wild, pitting our best wooley sweaters against all the fury of the Everlasting Winter of The Gods of The North as it descends upon us for a season testing our mettle and worth. Not this year. Not today.

My mom could not biologically have children, something wrong with her insides. My older brother and I were adopted. The family I was raised in as a boy, a chosen/created family, was so ideal, so full of love and warmth and care, so connected and dedicated that I never really questioned my belonging. But I knew friends who's families were anything but warm, anything but actively, outwardly loving. Those were biological families. I met my biological mother, it was surreal, and I would love to write a book about it, about the strange feeling of magnetic connection, a blood awareness...which was and is not love, and how that contrasts with what a family requires to BE a family.

Two days ago I spent an hour doing a series of relaxing, rejuvenating stretches. Over the course of the last three months I have gotten to set aside on hour per week to doing that, one of the things that keep me looking forward each week. After spending an hour to an hour and a half each of the other six days of the week grinding my way through grueling and vigorous work out programs, that stretch comes with a real sigh of relief. Not only is it a great relaxation, but it is a great moment of pride and accomplishments, since it means I have put one of the 13 weeks of the work-out cycle behind me. But the stretch I did two days ago came with even a greater sense of relief and pride, since it marked the FINAL DAY, and hence completion of a full round of the P90X workout program!!!

I DID IT!!!

Yes, I know what you're thinking..."Is he, then, now ripped?" Well...I can say I lost (at last count over a week ago) 3 inches, and about 20 pounds, have gained A LOT of muscle mass, am stronger and more flexible now than I ever have been...and it feels GREAT! I am going to do another round...another 90 days, and this time I am going to post before and after pics at the end, along with detailed measurements. To be honest, I was too ashamed of myself to take the obligatory "before" pics 3 months ago, but now I really wish I had, because I know that the change is phenomenal just from the way that I feel when I wake up every day! THANK YOU Tony Horton!

One last thing that I want to say about this. I have struggled with weight since I was in the 4th grade. Going through periods of excessive gain, to periods of profound skinniness...the unhealthy toothpick variety, and back again. Like a pendulum. But I have never been strong like this. I have never before 1) been more confident in my ability to keep the inches off 2) been more confident in my ability to become stronger, leaner, and healthier, and 3) been more confident of the fact that, while I am not in absolute, optimal fitness and shape, I am EXACTLY where I aught to be, and I am pretty damn proud of myself.

See you in 90 days.

I just read that Nick's great cartoon 'Avatar: The Last Airbender' is coming back on Monday, July 14th for the season and series conclusion! See this awesome trailer, and be amazed...



Yes...I hope that the good folks at AvatarSpirit.net got their news right!

Well, here I am, on the 16th day of training on the p90x fitness program (which I mentioned here a few weeks ago), and I still have not 1) died from exhaustion or 2) simply given up! That's right kiddies, I am working on my 3rd week of this pretty INTENSE fitness program, and even though my body is stiff and pained EVERY DAY, I am plodding along (even dieting to go with it). I am proud of my once chronically unfit self.

So, I thought it worthwhile to mention that I have embarked on yet another journey. In a bold maneuver designed to take my life in a totally new and fresh direction I have decided to engage myself upon the worthy path of P90X!

That's right, I have gotten myself the Beachbody P90X fitness program, and at first glance, it's no joke. There are twelve different intense workouts that get all shuffled about, keeping you working (HARD) every single day. There is an incredibly detailed nutrition plan, and it leaves NO room for mistaking. This thing looks merciless, but I feel I'm up for the challenge.